Summary
Microsoft recently published a set of instructions for removing Linux in order to install Windows. Here's a detailed set of instructions on doing the reverse. (1,300 words)

his column discusses a beta release of a Microsoft product. In other words, if something doesn't work the way we say it will, you're on your own, Roscoe, because no formal support is available from LinuxWorld on this or any other product from Microsoft. You can get informal support, however. Helen Waite is the current manager of informal product support. For information on obtaining any informal support for a beta release, you can go to Helen Waite.

The information in this column applies to any of the following nonfragmented versions of Windows:

• Microsoft Windows 3.1
• Microsoft Windows 3.11
• Microsoft Windows 95
• Microsoft Windows 95 with SP1
• Microsoft Windows 95 OSR2
• Microsoft Windows 98
• Microsoft Windows 98 SE
• Microsoft Windows NT Server 4.0
• Microsoft Windows NT Workstation 4.0
• Microsoft Windows NT Terminal Server Edition
• Microsoft Windows NT Server 4.0 with SP 2
• Microsoft Windows NT Workstation 4.0 with SP 2
• Microsoft Windows NT Server 4.0 with SP 3
• Microsoft Windows NT Workstation 4.0 with SP 3
• Microsoft Windows NT Server 4.0 with SP 4
• Microsoft Windows NT Workstation 4.0 with SP 4
• Microsoft Windows NT Server 4.0 with SP 5
• Microsoft Windows NT Workstation 4.0 with SP 5
• Microsoft Windows NT Server 4.0 with SP 6
• Microsoft Windows NT Workstation 4.0 with SP 6
• Microsoft Windows 2000 Advanced Server
• Microsoft Windows 2000 Datacenter
• Microsoft Windows 2000 Professional
• Microsoft Windows 2000 Server
• Microsoft Windows Millennium
• Microsoft Windows Herpes Edition

Step 1: First, you need to determine if Windows is on your system. Turn the system on. Does the system boot successfully to a command prompt or graphical login screen without problems or need for user intervention?

If so, then you may be running Windows.

If the system does not boot successfully to a graphical login screen or command prompt, then chances are even better that you're running Windows. In order to be sure, press the reset button or Control-Alt-Delete repeatedly to reboot the system until you can get to a graphical login screen or a command prompt.

If you are having problems getting to a command prompt or login screen, go to step 1a. If you can successfully get to a command prompt or login screen, go to step 1b.

Step 1a: If you continue to experience problems getting to a command prompt or login screen, call Microsoft for free installation technical support. Listen to Microsoft's staff tell you that Microsoft does not support Windows if it is preinstalled, which is how most copies of Windows get into the hands of innocent people. You must instead call the manufacturer of your PC for technical support.

Now call the manufacturer of your PC and ask the technical-support people there for support. Listen as they tell you to repartition and reformat your drive and reinstall Windows.

Repartition and reformat your drive. Reinstall Windows. When Windows fails to recognize your network card, use a computer with a reliable operating system like Linux to download the latest Windows drivers for your network card. Create a driver-installation floppy.

Insert the floppy containing the latest drivers for your network card and attempt to install the driver manually. Windows will tell you that you cannot install the driver manually because your card is a plug-and-play network card. You must allow Windows to detect the card automatically. Which it doesn't. Which is why you are trying to install the drivers manually in the first place.

Call Microsoft again and pay some ridiculous fee for technical support. Listen to them tell you to repartition and reformat your drive and reinstall Windows.

Ignore the advice. Instead, edit the registry. Just pick a registry setting at random and edit it. Don't worry about doing any damage, since you're not interested in getting Windows working anyway. The point is that, by now, you have some form of Windows on your machine that you have to get rid of in order to install Linux.

Step 1b: Assuming you have a system that boots successfully, there are two ways to determine whether or not your system is running Windows.

Look for one of the following telltale signs:

• The monitor spins all the way around and then hurls pea soup onto your keyboard.

• The system contains Windows partitions.

Here's how to tell if your system contains Windows partitions. First, look for evidence of disk drives. You can recognize Windows disk drives by their partitions. Examples of Windows partitions:

Single SCSI drive with single partition

C:

Single SCSI drive with multiple partitions

C: D:

Multiple SCSI drives each with single partition

C: D:

Multiple SCSI drives with multiple partitions

C: D:...this application has performed an illegal operation and will be shut down.

Also, Windows 2000 supports more than forty partition types, including:

• FAT 12.7
• FAT 16
• FAT 32
• 82muchFAT
• VFAT
• CHICKENFAT
• FATCHANCE
• NTFS (Not Too Fat System)
• AINTFS (An Improved NTFS)
• And lots, lots more. Honest. You just don't know about them because they're undocumented on purpose because they're inferior.

Unlike Linux, Windows does not support the most common Unix partition types. And not all versions of Windows support the same set of partitions and file systems. This incompatibility between Windows versions is intentional, because Microsoft doesn't want Windows to become fragmented like Unix.

If you find any of the above partitions on your drive, then do the following: Using rubber gloves, open up the case of your computer and carefully remove your hard drive. If you have more than one hard drive in your system, remove them all.

It doesn't matter if Windows wasn't using them all. Remove them anyway. It is possible that the infection may have spread from one disk to another due to their close proximity.

Submerge your disks in rapidly boiling water for at least one hour to destroy all possible bacteria. If this doesn't work, we suggest using thermite. If you do not have access to thermite, you may wish to dip your hard drives into a vat of molten steel. We recommend a vat of molten steel like the one that was used to melt the evil robot in Terminator 2. Except it wasn't really molten steel. They shone light through a bunch of gelatin in order to make it look like molten steel. And it isn't really a fair comparison anyway, since the bad guy in Terminator 2 wasn't nearly as dangerous as Windows. So forget I suggested it -- just get some thermite.

Purchase new hard drives for your system from a store that is certified Windows-free by your local health department.

Do not under any circumstances install these drives in your computer at this time. Before installing untainted drives in a computer that has been previously exposed to Windows, you must perform an act of exorcism to rid the computer of any remaining demonic presence.

There are at least two ways to approach this. The simplest way is to sprinkle your computer with holy water. If you do not have access to holy water, sprinkle it with tap water. Either way, the water will short out the system and destroy it, after which you can purchase a Windows-free system and start from scratch.

You can optionally perform an exorcism ritual or hire someone to perform it for you.

We recommend Jason Miller or Max von Sydow. Better yet, try Edward G. Robinson. Sure, he's dead, but dead people are easier to book, and they can more closely relate to Windows.

Once you have successfully cleansed and exorcised you computer (or have bought a new, untainted one), proceed to step 2.

Step 2: Install Linux.

About the author Nicholas Petreley is editorial director of LinuxWorld and columnist for InfoWorld.

Resources How to remove Linux and install Windows 2000: http://support.microsoft.com/support/kb/articles/q247/8/04.ASP?LNG=ENG&SA=ALLKB

Copyright © 1998-2002 LinuxWorld.com, an IDG Communications company.